sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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