I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
