I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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