help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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