Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
