do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
