If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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