Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
