: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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