but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize