margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
