the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
