Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
