smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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