I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
You've changed since you got that strap on
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
