if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize