Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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