just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
