from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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