Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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