was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Randomize
