I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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