He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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