you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
