What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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