Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
