this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Drunk is not a location!
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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