You work out of a Hotel?
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
