Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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