Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
He felt like a one man threesome
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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