I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize