Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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