It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
