WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize
