hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
