I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Randomize
