yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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