So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Life is so much better after having sex.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
