At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I need a hoe opinion
go on
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
