She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize
