Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
