Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
