Me. At least after what I've been through.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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