I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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