She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
