It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
