She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize