Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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