He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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