that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Randomize
