i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
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