Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Just pee around me
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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